Soul searching.. again?

i'm going to a place i haven't seen for years now. and no it is not my house. i'm going to visit a sister. a sister i never really appreciated until now. i have a lot to ask. but somewhat scared of the answers.

i need friends. in spite of me. in spite of what i say. in spite of what i show.

soul searching? i have searched for far too long.. maybe i should just stop. and accept that this.. what i have become.. however monstrous i seem to be.. this is still me.

i want to go back to that day.. i miss that day.